The Chicago Cubs: 5 Moves to Consider, Amongst All the Hair-Pulling

Let's all acknowledge this, right from the start: The Cubs are not going to win in 2011, nor in 2012.

The roster is poor, aged and frequently incapable of basic fundamentals. The new owner seems mainly concerned with creating a persona for himself, via appearances on shows like "Undercover Boss."

The organization, despite its vast resources, can't even prevent flocks of birds from obstructing games. The "ace" of the pitching staff is best known for a truly-wretched Harry Caray impersonation.

If this team was a scene from "Goodfellas," it'd be the one where Lorraine Bracco flushes the coca...

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